In a groundbreaking move destined to confuse anyone still pretending to understand what a “chain” is, Orderly announced its integration with Monad, a new layer-1 blockchain promising “parallelized execution” and “hyperscale throughput,” which in crypto is code for “we haven't launched yet but we have a deck.”
The partnership aims to deliver “omnichain DEX liquidity,” a phrase so utterly void of tangible meaning that even ChatGPT refused to define it. According to Orderly, this move will allow traders to experience “seamless liquidity across ecosystems,” assuming those ecosystems ever have users, functioning bridges, or reasons to exist.
Monad, backed by VCs still high off their Solana returns and looking for the next slot machine, claims it can process more transactions per second than Visa, the Moon, and God combined. Meanwhile, Orderly continues its slow transformation into a cross-chain liquidity hub that no one asked for, operating under the firm belief that if you just add enough buzzwords, the money will come back.
Analysts agree the announcement is exciting for anyone who still has the patience to decipher terms like “atomic execution layer” without quietly dying inside.